How to Move with Your Sanity Intact
Now, I’m not expert. I haven’t moved a gazillion times in my life. I’m not a military brat or a gypsy. In fact, I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve moved. But I think I’ve learned a few things these past few weeks about surviving a move. In addition to boxes, packing tape and paper to protect your valuables, you need a few other things.
Coffee, coke, tea–it doesn’t matter what you use, as long as it’s a source of caffeine. Packing up all your stuff takes a lot of energy, and you will need every scrap of energy you have just to pack up all your stuff. Might I suggest using the biggest coffee mug you have? Or perhaps bully your friends into getting you several Starbucks gift cards. Whichever works for you.
Nothing’s worse than going shopping for boxes. Now, I didn’t mind buying boxes, but let’s face it. You’re moving out of a house. I’m moving out of an apartment. Boxes get expensive. If you can borrow boxes from your friends, do so. Getting free boxes isn’t nearly as difficult as it sounds.
Take it from me: the less stuff you have to take with you, the better. So don’t be afraid to throw things away. Throw them in the trash, give it to Goodwill, pawn it or abandon it at your friend’s house–if you don’t use it, lose it.
For those of you who are pack rats, I’m sorry. You might need some anxiety medication.
If you don’t have access to convenient babysitters, then I recommend you find the nearest Temporal Anomaly and bolt it to your house. If you can figure out some way to give yourself an endless supply of time during your move, please do so. And then tell the rest of us where you got it. We don’t have access to futuristic gizmos. We just have to start early.
Unless your kids are old enough to help you pack, leave them at grandma’s. Or a babysitter. Or your best friend. Or whoever you can beg or bribe to watch your kids. You need as much time to pack as you possibly can, and trying to pack around kids is not easy.
At some point during the moving process, you will need to get away from the mess. As a reader, I found myself a new series of books and indulged. I spent time at the library. Maybe you should schedule time to go watch a movie. Or go bowling. Or bake cookies. But don’t go shopping–you don’t want to move more stuff, do you? Maybe you could just walk around and look at stuff instead. Window shop. Yeah, maybe that will work . . . .
Everyone needs to rent a tall person to reach those things on the top shelf that you haven’t touched in ten years. Or those photos your father hung on the wall when you were a kid. You know, the ones with an inch of gunk caked on it. Then, once that tall person done getting all the things you can’t reach, you can have him (or her) help you carry boxes to the Uhaul you just rented. Free labor!
If you’re already a tall person, good for you. I’m not tall. My tall person is my husband. And you can’t have him.
I was going to say dust mask, but no, you’ll need a gas mask–for cleaning out your fridge, if nothing else. Or taking out the trash. Or cleaning out your husbands office. Or cleaning out your kids’ rooms. Or the living room couch. Or–you get the idea. Stinky trash is everywhere. So is dust, dirt and yucky things. A gas mask will will help you keep breathing. And latex gloves will protect your hands. Make sure to wear gloves. And buy Windex. And paper towels. And lots of trash bags.
Hope you enjoyed the post! Got any other tips? Let me know in the comments below.